Georgia on my mind (part four...again)

Stone Mountain is about twenty minutes from downtown Atlanta, but like any short trip in that city it took over an hour. Despite the best efforts of the transportation system to provide buses, Marta trains and HOV lanes, the roads were packed with gas guzzling SUV’s and their lone, oblivious occupant. Each driver seemed to commit a minimal bit of concentration to the bumper to bumper traffic and frequently merging ramps. Usually they were too invested in the intensely animated conversations they were having on their cell phones. I could not even get our “HOV lane” applicable vehicle across the four lanes of traffic to help clear up a slight bit of the congestion. We were trapped in a slow moving drip of molasses, rolling forward at half the speed of smell.

We finally reached our destination, and the clearly marked signage guiding us to the World of Coca-Cola parking garage was a blessing. We had debated over which Atlanta attraction to visit on our short trip, and since we have two fine Aquariums in East Tennessee and the girls would have only cared about the CNN studio tour if there was somehow a detour through the Nickelodeon and Disney Channels, we settled on the World of Coca-Cola. It turned out to be an excellent choice.

The invention and history of Coke was explained in impressive detail, and the collection of memorabilia was staggering. I think the nugget of information that I appreciated most was the fact that the well-known logo of , with that clearly defined script, was designed by the hand of the inventor’s accountant and has not be altered since. In a world of change and compromise, where there is always some genius who thinks they can do better (“new coke?”), it’s comforting to know that some things still stand the test of time.

The girls loved the Coke Polar Bear, who was available for pictures. Unlike the multiple Mickey Mouse’s who hide in various rooms at the end of the extremely long lines at Disney World, this eight foot tall, cuddly beast was standing in a corner of the large, open Central Hall. The animatronics which made the face contort into big goofy grins and laughter was amazing. The eyes glistened and emoted in a way that made you feel like you were in the company of a real bear, only this bear would not rip you to shreds and eat you for dinner.

Another highlight for everyone but me was the 4-D motion theater movie “In Search of the Secret Formula.” Having grabbed our 3-D glasses and jumped in line, the girls asked if I was actually going to go inside. “Why wouldn’t I?” I asked, and they looked away, not wanting to remind me of my experience on the Back to the Future ride at Universal Studios, or the Star Wars experience at Disney’s Movie Theme Park. My motion sickness was not only bad for me, but often ruined the day for the entire family.

Once inside the theater waiting area, they got in line for the motion seats and I got in the line for infants, elderly and the injured. There was one other person in this line, an older woman who was using a cane. She looked at me a little suspiciously, so I smiled and said “I get motion sick.” She nodded and hobbled away from me as if I might be contagious.

When the doors to the theater opened and we were rushed inside, I found an elderly man asleep in one of the stationary seats in my row. For a moment I thought he might be dead, overcome by the intense visuals of the film, but just as I was going over to shake him I saw the slight movement of his chest during shallow breaths. I let him sleep.

After the movie, we entered the “tasting room,” which presented 63 flavors of soda from all over the world. I had given up carbonated drinks nearly six months ago and have not touched one since, but I told Connie that I would jump off the wagon for one hour while we made an international tour of fizzy drinks.

If you ever want to give up on sodas or be reminded why you gave them up in the first place, spend an hour in the World of Coke tasting room and try to taste all the flavors. Not only will you have to pee so bad that the walk to the restroom is painful (and that wonderful sensation is repeated several times throughout the rest of the day), but you also bloat up like a zeppelin and have the irrational fear that if you actually did burp (which you desperately want to do) that you would shatter all the glass in the building and most of Metro Atlanta.

Leaving World of Coke, we waddled around the Centennial Olympic Park. The variety of sweet, extremely sweet and bitter flavors were still battling it out in our taste buds, and the massive amount of carbonation we consumed made us feel a little woozy. Shelby and Taylor kicked off their shoes and frolicked in the fountains nearby, but all that splashing water only made me need to go to the bathroom again.

It was mid-afternoon and we hadn’t eaten lunch. Despite the balloon of air in our stomachs, we were getting hungry, so we decided to go the Varsity. Known as the world’s largest Drive-in Restaurant, the downtown location has been feeding burgers, hot dogs and onion rings to starving Georgia Tech students since 1928. Connie and I had been taken there over twenty years ago by her sister and brother-in-law and the ambiance was still the same: greasy, loud and rushed with the bark of “What’ll ya have?” from the counter folk. We loved it.

After lunch we decided to drive around downtown for a bit. Shelby had been begging us to go to the IKEA store since she learned we were going to Atlanta, but I wasn’t so sure. Shopping is not my idea of “vacation,” and since this trip was short anyway, I did not want to waste time in a store. Still, I had a general idea of where it was located, so as I meandered that direction, we eventually caught sight of the big yellow on blue lettering and Shelby pleaded for a visit.

The store is massive. It’s so big that I joked later that I was pretty sure I saw a Wal-Mart inside it. Shelby was in her element. She had been there with friends last year, so she excitedly showed us the ready-made room designs and the faux elegance that could be purchased for a reasonable price. I hated to admit that I was impressed, particularly with the cost, but after roaming around for what seemed like hours and passing what I was pretty sure was a sign that said “Welcome to Alabama,” I was more than ready to go.

That night we carried our chairs over to the expansive lawn beneath the great stone carving of Stone Mountain. The Marriott hotels onsite had an area roped off for guests in the lower section with a perfect view. As the light completely faded from the day and we all waited for the Laser show, we watched as kids played Frisbee and families picnicked on chicken and sandwiches. A full moon emerged from the scattered clouds and cast a warm glow over us all. It was a beautiful night.

The show itself is an experience that you must see, rather than have described to you. More than just flashing lights and fireworks, the images and music take you through a gamut of emotions. From the charged up southern thrill of “Sweet Home Alabama” to the patriotic pride of “America the Beautiful,” it’s a great show.

The next morning, we packed up and left Stone Mountain. Our drive home was relatively uneventful with the exception of getting lost and nearly driving south to Florida before Connie realized that the sun should have been on our right side instead of our left. MapQuest had failed me once again (I am now of the belief that our government used MapQuest directions to find weapons of mass destruction and Osama Bin Laden. They were probably looking in New Zealand).

Although it was a short, quickly planned trip, we had a great time. My previous view of Georgia as only a means to Florida beaches and theme parks has been altered. The north Georgia mountains are beautiful and our visit to Atlanta reminded me that there is a reason why so many people like living there, despite the horrible traffic. The charm of the south is as comforting as a glass of sweet tea on a hot day. And I do love my sweet tea.