Hypocritic Oaf

I hate to kick a man when he’s down, but when someone wears a “kick me” sign on their back and then asks “did you seen the sign?” it’s kind of hard not to give it a try. Besides, it’s the American way to toil on bad news. Whether tragic or sordid, we love to talk about other people’s misfortune. We usually disguise it with a sincere worried tone, but sometimes it’s just fun to say “what were they thinking?”

So….Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina, “what were you thinking?”

Sadly, I think we know. We’ve all seen it before, played out by celebrities in the media or amongst friends or even family. It happens. People stray. After my ramble on marriage yesterday, it was interesting to watch the news detail Sanford’s spectacular self-immolation. Over the last week his “disappearance” was at first a cause for concern, then a mystery, and finally a circus of media, awkward statements and misdirection.

When I started paying attention to the story, his staff had just announced that he was hiking the Appalachian Trail. This sparked my interest because I’ve been reading a lot of books about hiking the AT. I read the books not because I am interested in hiking the trail (and if you think I am, you really don’t know me at all), but because I’m fascinated by the people who do. To even consider it is brave, but to complete it inspires awe. It’s a daunting, amazing feat of perseverance, and I love to learn the various reasons why people do it.

All I knew about Mark Sanford at that time was that he was a governor who had planned to refuse the offer of Stimulus funds for his state. Now, I don’t have a problem with people who don’t eat meat because they have a moral issue with the slaughter of animals. I won’t personally give up burgers, but I can respect their opinion. What I’m trying to say, and probably not very well, is that they are standing on their principles, but it doesn’t really affect me, so more power to them. Sanford’s refusal of the Stimulus money might be a sincere personal statement against the Stimulus program and our expanding Federal debt, or it might be a grandstanding effort to draw attention to himself as the conservative alternative in the Presidential election of 2012. Either way, his choice would have affected a lot of people in South Carolina, basically punishing them because of his own personal stand or political agenda.

In what would normally be the biggest humiliation of most politicians year, Sanford was over-ruled this month by the South Carolina Supreme Court, effectively demanding that the he accept the Stimulus money and distribute it as suggested. Sanford released a statement that he would abide by the ruling, but called it a “bad day for South Carolina and the country.”
His disappearance last week at first seemed connected to the spanking the court had handed him, slinking away with his tail between his legs to pout and lick his wounds. Like a child who didn’t get his way, it seemed to be a hands in the air, “I don’t care anymore” statement.

His staff, floundering under questions about his whereabouts, struggled for answers. Most of us can disappear and no one but our immediate family and maybe our boss will care. The governor of a state cannot just walk away without saying where they are going. I would assume he has things to do. People will notice.

Meanwhile, his wife was no help either. She told reporters that she didn’t know where her husband was, and had not heard from him. Excuse me? I can’t go to the bathroom without someone in my house knocking on the door within 2 minutes to find out what I’m doing. Even when I travel, I talk to my wife at least twice a day and usually more. When I heard Sanford’s wife calmly saying “I don’t know,” all I could see was a red flag.

Bits and pieces of information added up to something entirely different going on. His registered South Carolina state vehicle…can you say “moron”…was found at the Atlanta Hartsfield Airport. That kind of destroyed the Appalachian Trail story. There are no direct flights to Springer Mountain or Mount Katahdin. I checked.

As you probably now know, because there’s no news like juicy, cheating news, Sanford was in Argentina with his “friend,” apparently named “Maria” (based on some emails released yesterday by a state newspaper). Their affair has been going on for some time, since the emails declaring their love for each other are dated July of last year. His wife learned of the situation in December and is now saying that she asked him to move out two weeks ago. It truly is a tangled web.


I can usually feel some empathy for people in humiliating situations, and I certainly do for Sanford’s wife and children. They didn’t ask for this attention, and I hope the glare of the spotlight stays squarely focused on him, leaving them to mourn the destruction of their family in private.

Sanford, however, deserves to be the piñata at this week’s media party. He gave up a certain degree of his right to privacy when he accepted public office, but then he stepped forward as a bastion of moral conscience, a title which requires a rigor and discipline that he obviously did not have.

Along with Newt Gingrich (who had his own admitted affairs), Sanford led the charge to impeach Bill Clinton for lying to a federal judge about Monica Lewinsky. When questioned about this by Fox News on June 4 of THIS YEAR (that’s three weeks ago folks), he had this to say about the Clinton scandal and his impeachment crusade:

QUESTION: But what-- what was your sense that I have to do this, or were you getting political pressure from groups at home to vote for it?

SANFORD: I would say it was-- something that people were excited about back home. People were talking about it. Again, the people you hear from at times, they-- they can be a vocal minority. But people were incensed. I mean, I think that there were enough sordid details to get people genuinely ticked off at-- the irreverence for the office.

Hmmm…I’ll bet he wishes he hadn’t used that phrase “irreverence for the office.” Pot meet Kettle.

Of course, liberals are being smug and giddy about another “holier than thou” character collapse (“Gov. Sanford, please take a seat at the Larry Craig table”), and conservatives are angry, and maybe embarrassed by another disappointing personal failing. But to say that moral failure is owned by one side or the other is ridiculous. Sanford, Clinton, Craig, John Edwards, Eliot Spitzer, Bob Barr, Strom Thurmond, Mark Foley…even John Kennedy, Warren Harding, and Thomas Jefferson all fell victim to human weakness. Shame is universal.

It’s natural, in our politically divided world to point fingers and enjoy an opponent’s downfall. If anything, however, this situation proves that the title of “liberal” or “conservative” really doesn’t strip away the most common bond of being “human.” This may be the greatest slap of all to those who wear their political label like a medal of honor. They talk about those with opposing viewpoints as if they are inanimate objects, representative of only one thing and holding no other value. It is no wonder the world has been repeatedly divided and damaged by wars when within our own country we cannot get along.

In a few weeks, Mark Sanford will be become a footnote in political history. Another promising political career tripped up by a roaming eye, weak knees and a clumsy character. He’ll have his own euphemism too, joining the cultural slang of Clinton’s “Lewinsky” and Kennedy’s “Happy Birthday, Mr. President.” As scandals go, it could be worse. Henceforth, sneaking off for an illicit affair shall be known as “hiking the AT.” Just make sure you watch your step.