Justice (part three)

“…that we alone are responsible for our actions and no one else.”

As a society we do not like to think about that because then we would have no one to blame for our own mistakes. Listen to almost any fight or argument between my kids, and at some point the words “she started it” or “she hit me first” will be uttered. It’s the same in bedrooms, boardrooms and on the street. Even if we admit some blame, there’s a caveat.

“Yes, I was wrong and I cheated on my wife…but she didn’t understand me.”

“Yes, I lied about the value of our stock…but that’s the way our business works.”

“Yes, I had a few drinks at dinner…but that car pulled out in front of me!”

Our laws have been buffered and neutered almost to a point of being totally ineffective because of our own innate, selfish desire to protect ourselves. Drunken driving laws are basically slaps on the wrists because those making the laws fear that horrible possibility that they too might someday find themselves standing at the scene of an accident they caused. It’s easier to make the laws more lenient than to consider the personal sacrifice of giving up the occasional social drinking opportunity.

Seven years ago one of my dearest friends was killed by a drunk driver. Leaving behind a wife and two young daughters, this kind, gentle man had his life stolen by a woman who had been partying with friends at a local lake that Sunday afternoon. Like so many of us who innocently leave our homes each day with the expectation to return that evening, he had no idea what was waiting for him on that fateful stretch of road.

The woman was charged with “vehicular manslaughter,” and after all the deals and hearings, she served a minimal amount of time in jail. I have no idea what her life was like before or what it’s been like since she killed my friend. She might wake up every morning with the full weight of what she did on her mind. She might have turned away from drinking completely, promising to never again cause such pain. I do not know what’s in her heart.

For her sake, and for what might lie ahead of her, I hope she is truly sorry and has changed, but truth be told, outside of the spiritual battle for her eternal soul, there’s a mark upon her in this life that cannot be removed. Through her deliberate actions, she took a life. No amount of prayer, conversion and tearful pleas for forgiveness can change that.

Our society has taken on a new mantra, one that has been used jokingly in many situations, but has somehow, quite dangerously, been accepted as an excuse for all inappropriate behavior: Act now and apologize later.

There is no excuse for drinking and driving. If you go to a bar without a plan to get home, you know it’s wrong. If you go to dinner and have a few glasses of wine or a margarita, don’t assume you are safe to drive just because you’ve made it home safely a hundred times before. It only takes once. If you do not understand the concept of “designated driver,” you are too stupid to be behind the wheel in the first place. It’s a pretty simple concept. Apologizing later and saying you didn’t think it would happen to you does not reduce your guilt.

Our weak stance on crime and punishment makes our nation an enabler of continued bad behavior. Without serious consequences, those who are easily tempted to break the law find the risk easier to accept. They are gamblers, willing to bet the higher stakes as long as the house gives them good odds. Even if they lose, they know they will generally walk away.

But this is not a roulette table, or a poker game...and the stakes are higher than a stack of plastic chips. While judges and attorneys construct plea bargains, the concern for the next victim is rarely considered. Deals are made to avoid the bother of a trial, turning what could have been a life sentence into a chance for parole in seven years.

There will be a great deal of questions into how Phillip Garrido was released so early from his 50 year sentence. Many will ask just how a convicted sex offender was able to hold a young girl in his home for so long, and even raise two more children in that same home without the authorities noticing. Already, there has been an apology from a local sheriff over a lack of follow up on a three year old 911 call alerting them to his strange behavior and the presence of children on his property. Apparently, the responding officers did not search his back yard. That simple action could have ended this ordeal right then.

I think about the last three years of my life. Three Christmas’s, three birthdays…my time with family and friends. What is that time worth? For me it is priceless. What was it worth to Jacee Dugard?


Jacee Dugard was kidnapped a few months after the birth of my oldest daughter. I can’t help but think about the lifetime of events that seem to have happened since then in our lives. My daughter starts college this week, which is still hard for me to believe, but also illustrates just how much that young kidnap victim has lost. Her family missed her teenage years. She did not have a “sweet sixteen” party (she was a mother at age fourteen, thanks to Garrido’s continued rapes). She did not go to her prom. She did not experience the innocence of young love or her first kiss with a boy she was sure she loved. All these things were stolen from her.

The more you hear of this story, the more infuriating it is. Garrido is now being investigated for a string of murders in his area. Finally, his property and other areas he had access to are being searched. After his arrest last week, the Nevada Division of Parole and Probation (responsible for his early release in 1988 from the 50 year sentence) sent a detainer notice to California, asking for a hold on Garrido for violation of his parole in Nevada. The incompetence would almost be comical if it were not so horribly destructive to the lives of the innocent.

Although I’m sure heads will roll for the miserable handling of the Garrido case, as well they should, we all hold some blame for the way this case and many others are allowed to be handled. We have allowed our laws and lawmakers to turn against us. We do not ask “why?” We do not demand answers. Unfortunately, most of our current “activists” involved in legal reform became that through tragedy. Do we have to wait for death to touch someone we love to see the problem?